Chapter 1: The Nature of Criticism

When you find yourself in the spotlight, criticism is an inevitable part of the journey. You might even encounter some vitriol from time to time. If you're uncertain about how to handle such negativity, look no further than the wise words of Mark Twain:

“Don’t wrestle with pigs. You both get dirty and only the pig likes it.”

Although it can be incredibly tempting to engage with detractors (and trust me, the temptation is real), ultimately, it's an unproductive endeavor. I speak from experience.

I've attempted to respond with kindness, to stand my ground with righteousness, and even to react with anger. However, what I soon realized was that those who spew hate are often ready to unleash even more. It's far more effective to let their flames die out by withholding the fuel of your attention.

“If you are not in the arena getting your ass kicked on occasion, I am not interested in or open to your feedback. There are a million cheap seats in the world today filled with people who will never be brave with their own lives, but will spend every ounce of energy they have hurling advice and judgment at those of us trying to dare greatly. Their only contributions are criticism, cynicism, and fear-mongering. If you’re criticizing from a place where you’re not also putting yourself on the line, I’m not interested in your feedback.” — Brené Brown

In a similar vein, the Navy SEALs state:

“Lions mustn’t concern themselves with the opinion of lambs.”

Chapter 2: Embracing the Hate

There’s a saying in the world of public figures: any publicity is good publicity. While I don’t fully subscribe to this idea—especially when it comes to dealing with harsh criticisms from anonymous sources—I do believe that attracting a few haters signals that your work is resonating with a wider audience. I’d gladly welcome some dissent in exchange for broader reach.

Here are several strategies that have helped me cope with negative feedback: